2010

Everyone celebrates the day that comes after 31st of December every year.
The only difference between the 31st of December and the 1st of January is 24 hours.

But at the moment in time, we choose to reminisce on what we have done in the past year, and think about what we are going to do in the coming year. That has been a tradition ever since the calendar was invented. We get a sense that we are heading somewhere when we actually measure the time that we have spent on this earth.

Having said that, 2009 was a real sucky year for me.

Lost but not lost, loved but not loved, given but not received. Yeah I could pity myself all day long, but once again I know these shitty experiences has toughened me up. For one thing, STA! (go figure).

I love my nation, I love Singapore, I understand the concept of national defense I really do. But experiences in service has shown me as usual, the human factor in the system has failed, we being mortal man who cannot be perfect. Crappy allowance, bland rations, overworked shifts, poor excuses for the situation, there's only so much that I can tolerate. Be a soldier, I was told, I was psyched, but when I got my brains back, I know the system can be improved.

My relationships have gone on a really wild ride. First there was the lost, then the renewed friendships, the new friendships, then the back to the start phase, then knowing that some people are meant to be there only in certain times of your life, then the realization that friends who ought to be kept at your side were gone because of circumstances of life, or because you are a sorry excuse for a friend, then there was the pining for someone who really tries to understand and not condemn. Yeah, been through it all. There were the saving graces, like my family who were always supportive (really, when it comes down to nothing, it's them you can rely on), and friends who have been there all along.

Did some things and failed to do many. Finally gotten around to learning how to drive but failed my first TP. Came of age but lost someone. Wanted to go for a holiday but only managed a road trip to Malaysia. I GOT MY IPHONE! (but so did a million other Singaporeans) Come to think of it, I need more than this time that I have to think about what I have achieved in 2009 other than being something that resembles a train wreck.

Having said that, 2009 is behind, and the next 363 days will be another period of trials and tribulations, joys and pains, sunshines and thunderstorms, of which I will emerge to write a lengthy post on in the period of the beginning of 2011.

By then I ought to have achieved my driver's license, maybe a motorbike license as well, gone to at least 2 exciting overseas holiday trips, gotten back into a school and doing a degree that I can excel in, earning my own keep with lots of gadgets I can afford. Anything more than that would be fantasy.

Side note: We can't blame our politicians for not coming to an agreement in Copenhagen for a greener earth because we are the suckers that demand they spent millions every New Year to pollute the atmosphere with purposefully packed gunpowder so that we can have a pretty sight to celebrate the New Year, which as I see it, is nothing to celebrate about because it has just begun and we haven't even achieved anything other than to see millions worth of taxpayer's money literally going up in smoke.

Having said that, don't be too hard on yourself. I'm one of those suckers too.