onimous

as I lie on the bed, I can't help but think
why did the wind bring a familiar scent to my nose
or why did the clouds show me a smile I saw long ago

Staring at the ceiling makes me wonder
why on earth am I here to have an existence
what's that which is missing in my heart?

My mind starts wandering along meandering streams of thoughts
filled with the what 'ifs' of life's unending situations
and whether continuation of it would be wise

am I here not for a reason?
am I here not for this season?
then I found the answer
it's not the love that I craved from others
for it will not last an eternity
but the love that was given long ago
something simple yet perfect
that of a man who gave his life for me
that I may live this life of mine.

suddenly all my thoughts and mindless cravings disappeared
I've found eternity, I've found my destiny
the calling to which I was choosen
for before this earth was made, I was created
in the mind of the Most High
He has kept me in His way and led me by His path
that I should not stay fallen forever
but He filled my heart and brought me peace
gave me mercy and gave me grace

What a love so free, for all You've done for me
sinful as I am without hope
yet hope I've found in You
where else can I have such perfect love
now my life is Yours alone
and all I long for is to dwell with You forever
to know Your ways will be my delight
to seek Your face will be my goal
and when I finally find You
there I'll kneel before You,
worshipping the splendor of your eternal glory.

my rest is in You alone.
for Your love never fails.